Rainy Boston Day…

I don’t think there’s a runner out there who doesn’t know that this is Boston day.

I hope the weather holds out and we have an amazing race with exciting results. No one wants pouring rain all day. Or the wind. No wind.

Here in Colorado we have other meanings for April 20th and I’m just skippin’ right over them.

They just aren’t nearly as wonderful.

~~~~~

Yesterday we went to Shaughnessy and Adam’s potluck in the park to celebrate their 5 year anniversary.

It was sketchy weather all week. 44* was the high for the day and it was projected rain and hail.

Yep. We were all holding our breath.

But rally on, Colorado. You always produce the sun, now don’t you?

I don’t think it really did get much over 44* but it was so sunny and we were all bundled in jackets and it was a great day.

Shaughnessy and Adam had tons of breakfast and hot stuff provided…

mini waffles and pancakes

sausage and bacon and eggs

biscuits and gravy!

people brought parfaits and french toast casserole

fruit bowls and pie

fried chicken and samosas!

coffee, tea, hot chocolate, seriously I cannot tell you how much there was of everything and so many people it was just great. A giant picnic breakfast in the park. It was great.

And yes, cake.

I ordered a cake from this amazing bakery here in Aurora.  It’s called Yum Yum Cake and Pastries

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Isn’t it gorgeous?  We (not we…I couldn’t…but everyone else did) ate half of it at the picnic. The bakery is a lovely little Korean bakery so the cake is very light, not too sweet.  They have sweet breads packaged and ready to buy and they are SO kind and friendly.  If you are in the area I highly recommend. A friendly local bakery that does such great work for really reasonable prices and also has good baked goods is just impossible to find.  I only wish they were gluten free. Ha.

~~~~~

After the party while Adam and Shaughnessy cleaned up the last tidbits of the party, the boys entertained Theboy.

Or at least that’s what you could say they were doing to save face… LOL

But they were all having fun :)

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So…Theboy was upset.  To help…Papa Sean put the car on top of the ball and dropped it as hard as he could to see how far up in the air he could shoot the car…

Pretty soon it became a contest to see how far everyone could shoot the car.  Theboy was pretty excited about this game of science. 

IMG_20150419_135733   IMG_20150419_135349

IMG_20150419_135759  IMG_20150419_135347

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“Hey, couldja hold my hat?”

~~~~~

Alex worked on the deck while Sean supervised ::chuckle:: and hey…Alex did a great job on digging those post holes.

~~~~~

When I got home I  couldn’t get warm so there was no way I was doing my long run. I considered doing it on the treadmill. I don’t mind that and it’s generally easy for me to do that. But I had a nagging ~don’t feel good~ feeling. Who knows why. So I put on my beloved sweatshirt and put in three miles on the treadmill to call it a night.

~~~~~

I bought a dress.

It’s not black.

It is going back.

So there’s that.

Run on…

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PTSD rant…don’t worry…it’s mostly short. But I mean hey…it’s our veterans. Seriously.

I’m updating this to say it doesn’t have to be just veterans. We know so many people can have PTSD, anyone that can go through a trauma.  Don’t misunderstand that it’s just a veteran. This one instance is what called my attention but I want to make sure we always know it’s very very real to a lot of people, military and not.

I’m going to briefly go off topic today.

I know.

You totally rolled your eyes at “briefly” didn’t you.

Sorry.

There was an incident in the local news today about a man involved in a standoff with police.  He was barricaded in an apartment complex and there were reports of shots fired.  The standoff lasted for about six hours and over the course of the day the police speculated drugs were involved. The man involved, a young man in his mid twenties if I have my information correct, was reportedly prior service, an Army Ranger.

Of course, the moment I heard of his prior service I suspected there were reasons for what was happening, right?

Unfortunately, as I listened to the people that were around me discussing the situation all I heard was a gigantic and sickening lack of compassion.

That’s what happens when you do drugs. 

I hope he knows what he’s doing…he’s going to end up dead.

Can you imagine how ***** off those people are that can’t get into their apartments?

I am speculating on this of course but…

… assuming this man suffers from PTSD and  complete and absolute lack of any sort of empathy or compassion for someone who may or may not be suffering from trauma and self treating with street drugs and this combination results in this mess of a standoff….

Well, as my sister Catherine (remember Sister Catherine?) would say…”can I get an ETA on your compassion?”

Respect PTSD-  Article: Anniversary Reactions: A Survivor's Guide on How to Cope by Angie Panos, Ph.D.

I just don’t find it funny.
Maybe he knows what he’s doing. And maybe he just doesn’t care.
I think he’s sick and he feels awful and he doesn’t want to hurt anymore.
I can’t imagine what his poor parents are feeling.  I can’t imagine the pain they are in, knowing how much he’s hurting and also praying he doesn’t hurt anyone else or himself before this standoff nightmare ends.
And I couldn’t care less how put out someone is from their apartment. I just don’t care.

That is all. I just had to say…

Today I am sad.
I am sad for this man and his family and for …
what our sons and daughters are bringing home in their heads.
PTSD...Peter Levine's, Healing trauma. Next week I have an intake of this therapy. I' ve read his book, I hope it will help me out of this hell.

Do you see how I abuse my blog for my own purposes?

I’m not even sorry.

Or as my co worker and half the world would say…

sorry I’m not sorry.

~~~~~

Five miles tonight and a good stretch…

It’s gonna be a wet weekend here folks.  But I’m excited to run anyway because…

I love to run. 

I know. You’re shocked by that revelation.

My runs have been okay. I thought they were going really well but after reviewing a few things I think I’m still a little slower than I’d prefer and I’m still stopping more than I’d like.

I was not very happy when I thought about it and then I came to this quick conclusion…

I still ran five miles 

I still get to run.

I think I’ll be grateful for my life today. 

this made me laugh out loud ... cause pretty much, that's what i'm saying in my head while i'm running .... it's ok if you suck ... at least you're trying ...

 

Run on…

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Snow fun…interpret as you will… ;)

We got snow.

We’re still getting snow.

It’s wet and heavy and gross.

And kind of pretty and foggy and I like it.

It’s supposed to continue through MONDAY.

I did not run.

Not because of the snow.

But because Sean and I went to a movie.

I KNOW>

There was a Sean sighting…can you believe it?

We went to see the Woman In Gold

I really liked it.

Now…I love any kind of movie that tells me a little history. I love learning about history. So to me this was a really good movie.
Pretty sure someone is going to shout from the rooftops it’s not accurate. It’s poorly told, whatever.  I liked it a lot.  I’m able to do my own research and figure out what’s right and what’s wrong… so I went and just enjoyed the movie.

~~~~~

My plan today was to throw out a few miles this morning…

and it’s foggy and beautiful so I really wanted to, what a great morning to run…

but MT was hangin’ with us before his big Senior presentation and I’d way rather do that.  I’ll run later.

Here he is in all his handsome glory…psst…anyone tired of seein’ my kids yet? sorry… ::sheepishgrin::

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~~~~~

I know most people are going to be excited to see Quentin Tarantino’s new movie The Hateful Eight but I grew up in the age of the great western, Clint Eastwood and the  hero cowboy saving the day. In today’s news of ISIS,  mass shootings (some just  a mile or two from us), black Americans afraid of being shot for being black and police afraid of being shot for being police….let’s watch a movie called The Hateful Eight.  Sadly, I love so much of the cast.  I just don’t want to deal with the violence. Such a bummer. Guess I’m a Pollyanna. 

I know, I know…tell me how you really feel.

~~~~~

How random is this post?

~~~~~

Spending the morning in our jammies in bed while MT hangs out with us in the rocking chair chatting about just nothing in general and we’re laughin’.

It’s the little things.

~~~~~~

 

yep.

Run on… 

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So this was my day off…

I was talking to Catherine (my beautiful amazing fabulous sister)  this morning…

Ya’ll don’t know her except by her name and her great comments because I’m a terrible person and don’t have any family photos on my dang computer.  Seriously I spent an hour looking for a photo of my dad this morning and I don’t have one! What is WRONG with me?

Ready for more what is wrong with me?

I wrote that an hour ago and now I can’t remember where I was going with this…

Oh wait…

I remember now…

She asked why I was at work…she thought I was taking a mental health day.

yes, I was. From blogging. Ha.

So hello… I clearly didn’t take a lot of time off.

And I’m still screwed up mentally, if that helps anyone out.

I ran a fast/slow 4.5 miles this morning.

My  miles were fast, but I stopped to breath and tell myself how tired I was several times.  Probably more than several.

It was discouraging.

After work (which was exhausting. My gosh I work four whole hours. It’s a wonder I can get anything done with all those dang hours I have to work…don’t hate me) I drove to Castle Rock and did the incline.

This is the view from the top…It’s got two hundred stairs and it’s technically the Castle Rock Mini Incline.  LOL.

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once you get to the top..you can hang out in the Adirondack chairs and rest before heading back down.

image

The view from the left is equally as beautiful.  It’s totally worth the climb. 

I did it twice so I could get my camera and take the photos.
image (5)

And because my day/week has felt all off like that, I took my tired little self to yoga.  Yep. at the actual studio. I took it to the classroom. I figured it could use some restoring. It was totally worth it though I am now thoroughly exhausted it was so good.

I managed to stay the entire hour (anyone that knows me knows THAT’S a miracle in and of itself. Ha) and I still feel pretty good.

I’m super tired and going to bed.

I have nothing of the wisdom sort to share with you beyond be kind to each other.

~~~~~

 

 

Run on…

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Filed under Motivation, Running, Spirituality

My mental health is suffering. I know, you’re thinking I just figured that out now?

So I’m taking a mental health day.

funny gif animated GIF

 

I have a friend at work who takes mental health days. 

I assumed this was code for “I’m sick of you people and I want a break so I’m skipping tomorrow”.

Yeah. Sometimes we feel that way about you, too. It’s okay. I don’t say that to her though.

parks and rec animated GIF

There are just some days when I feel like ~what the hell am I doing wrong?

In my head I know I cannot be the only person that feels this way.

Fortunately I have a few good friends that are screwed up like I am  deep and thoughtful like I am.

They recognize why I think the way I do and are quick to tell me it’s ok.

Full disclosure, one of them is my husband so sometimes he’s not really listening. And if he is he just kinda nods. But hey…he’s got my back at least 80% of the time. 

My other friend is like…half my age and three times as smart. So I believe she’s actually got a clue. I totally believe her when she tells me I’m not screwed up. LOL. And I do the same for her. I’m sure she really appreciates my expertise.

This has gone on far longer than I wanted.  I must leave so I can schedule my required fall apart time.

Also…I must run. We have high winds coming in later and man…I’m so over those.

By the way, I used that smiley because I love him. No other good reason. LOL.

I will leave you with this GIF which is is a perfect summation of my brain right now.

Also…I love Tina Fey.

depression animated GIF

 

~~~~~


Run on….

 

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Filed under Motivation, Running, Spirituality

Procrastination streak is over…productivity has moved in.

I’ve found myself with a list longer than my paper. So I made the choice to ditch everything and paint the rest of the cupboards.

I love it when a plan comes together.

Now…they weren’t exactly the color I was expecting…

ryan gosling animated GIF

 

I started to doubt myself….have I lost my artistic talent??

Probably.

Or I maybe just didn’t test the color and it isn’t exactly what I was looking for but it looks pretty good.

I imagine in the light of actual day (it’s 1:30am) it’s a really pretty color.

I’m likin’ it.

I’m really likin’ that I’m about 90% done with the project.

Nice…

So today the plan is to get a good  run in and some strength at the gym or maybe yoga.

I have to finish the project I’m starting so we’ll see what I’m capable of. But hey…I got a LOT done today.

~~~~~

Remember I had theboy for the weekend??

He and I took Malachi for a run.

Theboy image (25) image (26) image (27)

Be still my heart…

They were so pretty just runnin’ in the sunshine.

~~~~~

Yeah…

Run on…

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Filed under Running

Stuck on the corner of DON’T WALK and DON’T WALK

I headed out to do my nine miles last night and I’ll admit my heart wasn’t in it.  I wanted a fun run so I could stay home and hang with Sean. Also I have a ton of work to do so…yeah…really busy, my mind was sort of not on running this weekend.

Pretty sure the people at Nike and Brooks just got chills and they don’t know why…

Sorry Guys.

But I knew it would be way better to get it done than put it off so I headed out.

Also, I knew if it wasn’t coming through I could call Sean and he’d come get me.

I know, you’re thinking why call? Why not run home?

Um…24mph winds…

time animated GIF

not friendly.

So I planned a run that was 9 miles out with the wind at my back. :)

Last week I asked MT if that was cheating.

He said it was resourceful.

this is why he’s my favorite.

After about a mile I really settled in and felt pretty good…  figured maybe I’ll cut it short and just do it tomorrow.

Ditto at two miles.

This continued on for awhile and finally I decided to stop being a wuss and get it done.

I chose a direction (well, it chose me, right?) but I knew the end result was SO WORTH IT.  I love this particular way. It has a great road that’s all windy and downhill and so flyin’ fun to run down…

When I dragged my sorry butt up the two freaking miles of painful awful slow miles of hills leading to it I stopped at the corner and pushed the button to wait for the light.

This…is a light.

It’s like 8 lanes.

Super ass busy.

Traffic flyin’.

It skipped me. Both ways.

I pushed again.

And again.

And yes…again.

Hello…I was only at 6.37 miles!

And now I’m at a dilemma…what to do??

I walked into Walgreens and called Sean to come get me.

It was now super cold, I was tired and I was beyond sad.

All because I couldn’t cross the street.

I’d like to point out…I’m not usually that nervous about crossing the street but this street is nothing to mess with and I’m not going to be a statistic no way.  I even asked Sean later and he agreed…yep. Not worth it there.

I was stuck.

So now I have to decide if I want to try again tonight or just skip it and be bummed.

~~~~~

Yesterday we tore our deck out.  We’ve lived here for 18 years and it was there when we moved in. We’ve sanded and refinished it many times.  It was still so good to see it go and fun as hell to watch the boys work.

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009 023
 070057

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Montana…come stand on this… (and he does)
~~~~~

Weekend with theboy.  Time with Shaughnessy and Adam.  All the guys working together. It’s the little things.
~~~~~

Happy anniversary to Shaughnessy and Adam! Five years strong…

~~~~~

Run on…

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Filed under Motivation, Running

Who do you think you are?

Ha. See now..you thought that was a snotty title, didn’t you. That’s how well you know me. ;)
It’s all in how you read it.

Remember yesterday when I said I’d contradict everything I said?

So here I am. Contradicting.

Runner’s World keeps sending me emails that say “Run Off Ten Pounds!”

Are they in my head?

As much as I firmly believe I should be accepting of my body in all it’s glory…

victorias secret animated GIF

I always expect more from it. I will always be working harder. I will always be looking at it critically.

I will simultaneously be thankful for it’s strength, it’s gifts, it’s ability to persevere throughout all I’ve done to it and all nature has done to it. #thankyouceliac #hypothyroidismsucks #alwaysmigraines

So I’m not ever going to be the glossy blogger who says all is wonderful and I love my body and isn’t Paleo great and hey clean eating rocks and every stretch mark on my body is a gift reminding me of my beautiful children, etc etc.

I know, I’m a little hard core. Sorry.

But…that being said, I do love my body even as I have really unhappy feelings about certain parts of it. And I prefer cupcakes SO much and if I could eat gluten you can bet your sweet butt I would because WHOA it’s  really a hassle for not just me but every single person in my family…close and extended. And every stretch mark on my body? Nothing good to say bout those. Sorry. Never liked them. Never will. I hide them as often as possible. So there. ;)

How many of you saw this Dove ad?

I actually thought this was really interesting.

What would you choose?

Would you choose something different in public…than in private?

Would you choose differently on different days based on how you feel?

I would not.

Not for lack of self confidence. I see myself as very practical and objective. I can look in a mirror and see that this is appealing and this isn’t, etc.

There are definitely days I feel more beautiful than other days but I’ve never been an “I’m beautiful” person.

I would march my way through the average door without hesitation and I would do it publicly and privately.

But I also see how difficult it would be to allow yourself to go through the beautiful door and recognizing the self confidence and worth enough to do it.

I hope you are happy with your body and who you are but no judgment here if you aren’t. You’ll have to get in line with the rest of us. But most of all I hope you are just happy.  And if you aren’t happy with your body and feel you need to make some changes, please make sure they are healthy changes and not just the quickie 3 Days to a Bikini Body diet. 

mean girls animated GIF

~~~~~

Five miles yesterday before work. It feels so good to run before work.  I could keep these hours forever. I know I’m spoiled so I figure it’s probably not going to last but a girl can only hope, right?

My running is good and strong and I’m balancing it with yoga which is necessary for good health and no injuries (knock on wood).

It’s been a good running week. It started out not a lot of running but balanced out well, migraine be damned.

Run on…

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Filed under Celiac, Hypothyroidism, Migraines, Motivation, Running, Tess

Hibernation is not my friend.

I had to work a full day today and when I got home…I figured out something quite startling…

I mean…I’ve suspected in the past but…

really I was afraid to go there..

I’m a bear.

The moment I’m cold…

BAM

I’m asleep

friends animated GIF

 

And…I was out.

Seriously out.

I was asleep for the night. Woke up at 11pm.

Hello the entire night lost. HOW WRONG IS THAT?

confused animated GIF

 

I don’t know! I totally regret it!

Bright side?

I have made it an entire day~ an ENTIRE DAY~without any sign of a migraine. Nada. None. Gone. cue angels.

hallelujah animated GIF

~~~~~

I have a friend who blogs and has a business and she is amazing at it. Girl really COULD sell snow to eskimos.

She used to be overweight (I’m going to say not greatly overweight, she may argue with that) and one day had a wake up call. She lost a great amount of weight, and now encourages and motivates people to lose weight and lead happy healthy lives, too, through her business.  She’s very motivating and inspirational and generally people just love her.

I am going to give an opinion though.  She posts “before” photos of herself on FB when she was not at her healthiest weight.

When she first posted it this morning I thought…what is this?

Then I was able to read it and I thought…um…that’s her before photo?

In all fairness…it wasn’t her first before photo…I think it was a few pounds in. But she made it clear she was not happy about this photo.

sigh. Girl has better abs at her horrible awful ~I must make a change in my life~ photo than I have ever had. What the hell?

And of course, everyone that spends any time with her is like..wow!  What a huge CHANGE! You look so GREAT now!

I just think we need some perspective please and yes..she is my friend and she knows I love her.

Every body is different! We can’t really look at one person and their weight or size and give a blanket “wow, that size is CRAZY. Can you believe she was/is ~insert weight or size here~”. It’s patently unfair.  There are a million different factors that make up a person and we do have to careful not to give a blanket statement like that. 

Sometimes little words may make a difference…

“for me…this weight was just too high and I was very uncomfortable in my own skin”~ or something along those lines maybe?

For all you know, someone has been working very hard to get to the goal weight or size you just posted as your “can you believe I was ever at THAT SIZE” moment.

Not everyone was meant to be a size 2 or a size 4.

A lot of people are incredibly comfortable at a size 12 or 14.

I have a friend who is training for an ironman and if I recall she is a size 12.  Girl is amazing…she runs FAR more than I do. She bikes like a maniac. I can’t tell you how crazy she is.  She seems quite comfortable in her size twelveness.  And she’s just beautiful.

I firmly believe in the goal of being healthy.

I firmly believe in the goal of eating good clean healthy foods consistently and forever.

I firmly believe in regular and consist real and heart rate raising exercise. Make it count. 

I firmly believe in strength training as part of your regular routine.

And if you do all that…it will be there. 

I don’t think you need to be a size 4. I just don’t.

I don’t think you need to be bikini ready.

Now…

after I said all this…tomorrow’s post is going to contradict a lot of this.  But hang with me.  Hopefully it makes sense.

~~~~~

A migraine free day.

A quick visit from Alex Michael.

Sean hibernated with me.

MT came home from work and talked to me for a few quiet minutes in the kitchen….

It’s the little things.

~~~~~

Everybody do it!

Run on…

 

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Ohhh….here we go now. Gonna be busy! (Prayers much appreciated)

As I promised… here’s what’s coming up providing I don’t get injured or screw things up.

And something almost always happens in that regard when I announce anything. Sigh.
So if you feel like it…couldja knock on wood or something? That would be helpful.

I’m risking it.  I’m not runnin’ Boston for cryin’ out loud. I’m always just in it for the fun.

fun animated GIF

May 2nd it’s the Pittsburgh Half Marathon to see Miss Ria, Miss Kat, Mo :), and hopefully Miss Erin who has to drive five freaking hours (I love her).

May 17th I’m running the Colfax Half marathon with Michelle ::waves at Michelle!::

May 25th it’s the Bolder Boulder Baby… :)  An annual favorite!

June 20th it’s the Heavy Half Leadville (15 miles straight uphill which will really be a slow hike because…really?  let’s be real here Teresa)

August 1st is the Rocky Mountain Half Marathon in Estes Park!  Love it so much.  I get to do this with Kristen and Kat from my online running group. They are flying in to join me and I’m pretty excited. What great friends!

There may be a race or two stuck in the middle there because I fell in love with so many during the running of the 13 in 2013.

~~~~

I read a friend’s blog today and it held disturbing headline news.

The story isn’t important, it was just that it was so sad it made me cry.

Most people say “I don’t read the news.  It’s all bad anyway”.

I read the news.

I read the news because I need to know what’s happening in the world. Guess what? It’s not all good. It’s not all bad. Sometimes it’s neutral. It’s a mix. I would totally miss the good if I didn’t read and the good is what reminds you it’s okay to keep moving forward. That really it’s an amazing place out there and evil hasn’t really taken over.

I need reminding after days like this.

So I scope out headlines like this:

Good Samaritans who save family from RV fire

or Handcuffed hero: Teen helps save life of officer who arrested him

this one will stop your heart…but hang on…everyone is ok in the end.

Subway carries 3-year-old boy’s dad away

Just little stories that warm your heart.

Because keeping up on current events is just smart politically, economically and in business. It’s just smart. But sometimes it hurts so you have to balance it with the good stuff. Take care of you.

~~~~~

Getting hard copy photos I ordered in the mail.  A: presents :)  B: pictures of my cute family. It’s the little things. 

~~~~~

every day. Fitness motivation inspiration fitspo crossfit running workout exercise

Run on…be strong….

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Filed under Motivation, Races, Running, Tess