The countdown.

  • MT leaves us in 6 days. Technically 7 but we say goodbye on Sunday. Pretty rude of him. Raise him, feed him, provide clothing, a room and a bed, a lovely home and the rotten teenager ditches your ass faster than you can say “just join the Marines why don’t you!” and he’s gone. So.rude.
  • Did I mention he gets his associates degree the day before? He’s kind of an awesome kid. Too bad I like him so much.
  • We spent the weekend hangin’ with the family.  On Sunday we had breakfast at LePeep (it’s my favorite) and then hung out at Shaughnessy and Adam’s new house just talking about nothing in particular and laughing about everything ridiculous.  Shaughnessy found a very sketch sectional on Craigslist so they all got in their cars and ran over to the even sketchier guy’s house and grabbed it and let me tell you….watching these guys attempting to get this couch into the basement of the house built in 1947…it was entertaining.  They did it. Took the french doors off, the feet off the couch and the railings off the stairs. That couch is in there forever. Hope she likes it.
  • MT is detailing my car. It’s not dirty it’s just “messy” with lots of nitnoid little things. As he gatherered my little things he came across this:
    IMG_20160502_100933
    yep…that’s 8 pens and a carpenter’s pencil. You can thank Alex for the pencil. But I don’t give it back because it reminds me of my dad. The pens…that’s just my own neurosis. What if I don’t have one in the car and I really really need one? So I grab another. In case you’re wondering about the cup….it’s one of those $.99 cups you can get at the grocery store but it fits in my cupholder as general “hold all”. And I like purple and black. Jeeps, you  know, are bare bones.
    You should see my purse… Bet you $100 there are six pens in there right now. Sigh…I have a problem. 
  • It is a high of 55* today and no snow in the forecast (well…on Friday it’s supposed to rain but we’re not thinking about Friday). You think that’s no big deal?  It has snowed/rained/sleeted for three straight days. It’s been crazy wet.  One commenter wrote “I was starting to mold“. So true. So very true.  You should SEE my grass…it’s incredible.
  • It’s been two weeks on the new scrip and so far…I’m not feeling amazing and renewed. I know you’re all shocked. Am I trusting my doctor? Well…no. But I’m humoring her because she did say if I don’t feel better to let her know and they’ll tweak it again. I will be taking her up on that because I’m pretty much unconscious. Good Lord I’m exhausted all the freaking time. All.the.time. I did not miss this when my numbers had found their lovely sweet spot.
  • This weekend was the half marathon in Pitt that I do every year and this year I canceled because I wanted to spend some last minute days with MT. It’s a wonderful race that takes you all around the city crossing all their bridges. This year though…muggy and wet. Darn…so sorry I had to miss it! Those girls did GREAT. They had a great time and missed me so much! That’s what I tell myself.. 🙂 They texted me the whole time and I definitely felt included. Look how cute they are?  So cute and so kickin’ ass.
    pittsburgh
  • Good article on Celiac Disease- 6 Celiac Disease Myths You Shouldn’t Believe
  • Shooting this out to you guys and then off to enjoy a beautiful run on this gorgeous day. It’s a big week for us and we’re going to enjoy as much of MT (thekid) as we can even though he’s being awful and leaving us.

    ~
    ~~~~


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I am here…still running. Not fast. not far. But running and that’s all that matters. Run on…

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Because family.

We are helping Shaughnessy and Adam move into their new house today. It’s not really new. It was built in 1947 which is incredibly cool and it’s so beautiful and they are beyond excited. They want their things so they can move ON. I don’t blame them. So I am forgoing a post today so we can move stuff. Because that’s far more productive. Right?

Yes.

And I know they wanted to hire movers. And I know they didn’t want to ask us for help because they feel like they’re imposing. But my whole life that’s what you do…you ask family. Isn’t that what family is for?

That’s what my family was for.

We never thought it was imposing. It was what you did. and nobody minded…it was a day to work together and get together and help each other and it was all about hard work and connecting and love. And why pay somebody when you don’t have to?

So…yeah.

We’re moving today.

See you tomorrow~

~~~~~

still running…

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This confirms it…nothing I do is normal…

I have one of the strangest symptoms of all for my migraines. Everyone talks about the “aura” and being sensitive to lights and nausea…all very common symptoms of migraines. I have or have had all of these things. But I have one truly whack symptom and there is no way to really put this one in a descriptive box.

My skin hurts. I mean HURTS. Like…OHMYGOSHIHAVEADISEASEORSOMETHING hurts. It used to hurt just on my jawline and it would be very tender if I even tried to touch it. I remember kind of thinking…huh…I wonder if I’m getting a migraine. And that was how I put it together. Now it’s escalated and the skin over my ribs hurt…all along my ribcage…the back of my shoulders…the back of my neck…it’s strange the parts that do hurt but it’s all over and it’s unbelievable. It’s not like you have to make an effort…just a brush of the skin and it’s the most painful thing ever.

I try not to do that. 

This morning I Googled “why is my skin sensitive” (shut up, sometimes you have to get creative in your Googling) symptoms and found this:

Migraines

Migraines can cause throbbing sensation or a pulsing sensation in one part of the head for hours to days. Migraines can also cause nausea, vomiting, extreme sensitivity to heat, light and pressure. Sometimes even a gentle touch to the skin on face or combing hair can cause pain if you have a severe migraine headache. ~source

Migraine – People who suffer from migraine may experience skin pain even when they are just combing their hair or wearing a necklace. ~source

So apparently this is very normal and after all these years I just never knew it was normal.  Years of reading just never produced the information that Oh my gosh my skin is like…on fire with pain. I can’t even describe how sensitive it is. It’s so weird. My meds lessen it to a degree which is lovely but information is important. I love having information. Knowledge is power.

~~~~~

My phone keeps notifying me of my flight today and of the weather in Pittsburgh. I’m so sad~  Because MT is leaving a month sooner than expected, I canceled my trip to Pitt. I don’t regret that for a second but I do miss going. It’s an annual trip and I will miss those girls so much. Apparently it’s going to be raining so I won’t miss that. But they will have SO much fun. I expect lots of photos…

~~~~~

It’s snowing. Remember I told you guys it was coming? Well, it’s here. I’m putting a smile on my face. We always need the moisture, right? Looks like the treadmill for me. I considered running outside but I’m very cold already thanks to the headache so I’m opting for the treadmill.

Also…I’m over the snow. Don’t tell anyone.

~~~~~

Photos from this weekend…

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Theboy took this~

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Uncle MT calming a crying boy

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this look on his face cracks me up. Theboy being the most goofy of all…hilarious.
~~~~~

I’m still running…

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I am totally in control. Until I’m not.

There are some days that I have complete confidence in how things are going and I sail through my day with a kick in my step…a grin on my face (it’s my dad’s…he gave it to me) and a sarcastic little sense of humor that gives me joy.

Then there are the days when I seem to lose my mind and I can’t think straight. I give people blank looks when they’re talking to me because I’m thinking of the fourteen things I need to do and can’t or don’t know how or am freaking out internally because WHY AREN’T THEY DONE YET and SO MUCH TO DO.

There aren’t enough lists in the world to remember it all and every day I think of some other little thing that needs to be done or remembered or some little detail. Those are the days I feel completely out of control. Therapy.

~~~~~

It’s snowing.

~~~~~

My last day of feeling rough was clearly yesterday because today (after a morning of yoga stretches and …yes a few headache meds…) I feel great. After getting some serious errands/tasks done I want to run even if it is still snowing.

Did I mention it’s snowing?

sigh.

~~~~~
My friend just posted this and I laughed so hard. Great stuff.


source

~~~~~

I just loved this…it made me smile.

I’m over here…still running…

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It doesn’t have to always be awful.

I did get a run in while in MT and the weather was perfect for it. Sunday I was just too tired and thought I’d skip a day and after getting in so late I thought…no run on Monday. Rest.

But I returned the rental car and walked back so I got in a 2.5 mile walk on the biggest hills ever so I figure that counts.

I have errands and appointments and meetings but I’m hoping to run later because the weather will be perfect (high of 57*!). If I don’t, it’s not the end of the world. I still feel really tired so it wouldn’t kill me to miss a day.

~~~~~

I’m 48 years old and about a sneeze away from 49. If I am warm, someone will comment it’s a hot flash. If I say something to my doctor about my weight, I get that it’s normal for my age. I get the whole “body changes” and so on. I don’t live under a rock and I totally accept my life is definitely going to change. Everything is going to change. I’m  a realist and I’m going into this with my eyes wide open.

I take issue with the constant barrage of negativity surrounding the experience.  There is no opportunity to enter this phase of my life with positivity because I’m too busy trying not to hear the almost daily comments on Facebook, from friends, on television in the media, everything that Menopause is the worst. The WORST.
 1. My body hasn’t been the same since…
     2.  I gained SO much weight and it isn’t budging. Must be nice to shop in those sizes…I haven’t seen anything even close to that size since before Menopause…
     3.  I used to have good skin…
     4. Sleep? What’s that? Since Menopause I never sleep…

I just want to scream out to the world that sometimes EVERY thought doesn’t need to be expressed. And sometimes true honesty isn’t REALLY the best direction for everyone. It’s okay to just power through a little with some positive thoughts and try to remember it could be worse. I mean for heaven’s sake, millions of women have done this before you and will after you. I get your life is changing but how you deal with it, how you process it affects everything and I can’t imagine being constantly negative about something…even if it did make me feel awful. And it does no good for the women coming after you. It’s like telling a pregnant woman your horror labor story. It only serves to scare people, not prepare them.

If anything, perhaps a positive direction would be in order. I’m not sleeping? Suggest what has worked for you. Weight loss? Maybe try a new workout together. Mix things up. Maybe you have a great moisturizer that helps diminish the obvious changes.

I know, talk to me in ten years and I’ll probably give you an earful. But…did you ask to hear it? Did you say, “tell me about menopause and what I can expect” or did I just walk up and throw out the information.

I just think every phase of our life can be celebrated somehow. Every phase is hard and we choose how to get through it. It has to be easier to be happy and embrace the changes rather than fight them…or maybe fight them with a great attitude. Change happens. Embrace the suck.

*and if anyone has a great moisturizer…I’ll take tips. (the irony is my skin isn’t changing yet but I need a good moisturizer!)

~~~~~

Tag a CHAMPION that impacts you and your fitness journey! #motivation #Instagram:

I’m here…still running…

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The worst road trip ever. No really. Ever.

MT and Eliot and I came home yesterday through a harrowing freak blizzard. 

It’s pretty normal to hear me say, “I’m from MT, I can drive in anything”. But when you put my five year old grandson in the car with my youngest kid (or any of my kids..really, right?)…the pressure was on. I had left my Jeep in Denver because it’s got some miles on it and (oh the irony) I was nervous about the possibility of a breakdown and being stranded in Wyoming. MT was possibly going to stay in MT an extra day which would have left me on the road stranded with a five year old.

I opted to rent. They gave me a small white Mazda…

Not a great choice in a freak blizzard.

I won’t go into details but it was scary as hell and I wanted my Jeep. Stupid little cars. #imbitter

Also, after driving like that for four hours I found my hands were clenched, my eyebrows were furrowed in a deep state of worry and my face was squenched…I would have to consciously relax myself every 15 or 20 minutes just to do a reset. Each time I did my face felt so frozen I thought…holy crap my mother was right.

It takes an hour and 50 minutes to get from Billings, MT to Sheridan, WY.

We left at noon and got to Sheridan at four. That’s when they closed the interstate.

Yes, that’s right. Those gates you see and the lights? They actually used them. Shut the thing down.

They don’t mess around, either. First sign warns you it’s coming up…the interstate is closed ahead~ take the next available exit.

The next sign says ~we aren’t kidding. You have one mile. And that’s your only exit so don’t think you get to go any further than that. Why don’t you listen to us?~

Road Closed Clipart source

I paraphrased a little but that was the gist.

They were really really really not kidding. Flashing lights…blocked gates, the whole thing.

So we did what we were told (kind of a first for us)…and then figured out how to kill time until they reopened it. Went to the greatest little JCPenney ever and bought MT a sweatshirt and Theboy a pair of “comfy pants”. A few other pick ups and then I grabbed Qdoba and we went across the street to Perkins. I had promised Theboy funny face pancakes and I hoped they could do it for him.

I told the host right away that I had Celiac and couldn’t eat at Perkins but I wanted them to be able to. Would he mind if I brought my Qdoba in? Note: I’ve done this several times before and restaurants are generally pretty cool about it. He said he wasn’t the manager and they had a very strict policy against outside food. He’d make an exception but he’d put me in the corner away from the other customers. He told me those things twice..in case I didn’t get it I guess. He made it a point to say the manager would never allow it so it’s a good thing I got him.

He wasn’t kidding. 

You know how restaurants have like…two or three rooms so on Sunday morning they can open up those extra sections? yeah…we got a whole room to ourselves and in the far back corner at that. We couldn’t be any more in the back and away from customers. I think we may have been in the neighboring restaurant.

And I took it with a smile and was gracious because I needed to make sure they had food so we could get going again.

It was embarrassing and disappointing and whatever. It is what it is. But I didn’t have to like it. It just added on to the really awful day we’d already had.

It’s okay…I showed him. I totally lost my lunch about twelve minutes after I ate it. All that bother and for no good. #Ishouldknowbetter #benice

We finally (finally! This was where Theboy’s beautiful patience level left us and he just couldn’t be made happy. And who could blame him…we had an entire day of driving ahead of us and we’d already been on the road the whole day) made it out of Sheridan and back on the road and…

Random stranger had a flat tire. In the snow and the sleet and the icy roads.

Did I mention MT works at Discount Tire ? So we stopped and he spent a lot of time in the snow/sleet/freezing rain/all of the above working on this tire. When he got back in the car he was drenched and cold. No hat, no gloves and really really cold. One more stop to grab dry clothes and back on the road.

Longest.day.ever.

Somewhere between Casper and Cheyenne we had one more fun experience just to top off our night. I attempted to pass a semi (in the world’s tiniest little car).

He was maybe…not truly with us? Maybe he was tired. Maybe just distracted. Either way.. he drifted over into our lane and pushed us off the road slightly in order to avoid becoming squished. oh.my.gosh. We couldn’t even breathe. Our adrenaline shot through the roof. I think we were scared for the next five miles. My hands were shaking, my heart was racing and  MT was the same way.

That’s the point when I grabbed his hand (with slightly  hysterical laughter) and I said a prayer. We didn’t have much farther to go but come ON. This had been such a terrible trip and I was starting to think the odds were not in our favor of making it home in one piece.

We eventually pulled in to Denver at Midnight…dropped Theboy at his mom and dad’s and slowly and quietly made our way home to bed at 1am.

~~~~

A little joy to remember the day with…

 

~~~~~

I’m here. Still running. 

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We drove to MT and Theboy entertained us with “isms”

it’s an 8 hour drive to MT from Denver and we left fairly late in the morning. MT (my son not the state) and I had many things to do to including picking up  Theboy so it took us a little while to get it all organized and set and some of it just couldn’t be done until a set time. Couldn’t be helped so we opted to not stress about it. Get there when we can and have a great road trip.

We picked up the rental car, fought with the child restraint seat (even at five years old and nearly as tall as I am ~there is no possible way I’m exaggerating~ he still rides in that seat) and drove to the new house. By “new” I mean they closed on it Thursday. It was built in 1915. It’s really quite beautiful. So we had to tour the house before we left so we could see all the fabulousness…

And then off we went to far and adventurous places.

We were on the road for nearly twenty WHOLE minutes when a little voice from the back seat said, “are we in MT yet?”

LOL…um…no.  We’re not out of Denver yet.

Ten minutes later…”are we in MT yet?”

hehe…um…no.  Still in Denver.

roughly ten minutes later….”are we in MT yet?”  Can we let you know when we’re out of Denver?

Dude. It’s going to be a long drive. Settle in.

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movie, popcorn and a drink…doesn’t get better than that. *these are kid headphones that lower the volume for safe listening and excellent overhearing of adult conversations…;) * 

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~isms…~

Are we in MT yet? (probably eleven times)

Are we in Wyoming? (how does he know there IS a wyoming?)

Did the car just fart? (this was after  construction sent us to the ridges on the side of the road)

I’m almost out of popcorn. *sigh* I’m hungry

This was one of my favorites…we were crossing over into MT and he stopped looking at the movie and looked out the window and said, “can you stop here because I want to get out and play”. ~yes…that’s how beautiful MT is…

~~~~~

I got up this morning and ran a quick 3 miles (a little more) but nowhere near the 4 miles I thought I was doing because I do math good.

At least I got a run in and it was 50* and overcast in Billings.

Yes, I ordered it.

The perfect weather.

It’s okay, I know you’re jealous.

We’re running far too any errands today and then we’re off to a family wedding so this is short and sweet!

I’m sure we’ll have photos that do not show him doing this all weekend long but for now…this HAS been our view of him.

IMG_20160422_210621530

~~~~~

too often - we forget to take care of ourselves first. Then we wonder why we run out of gas.:

Run on…for the good of you…

 

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When tragedy strikes…organizing tragedy that is.

      • Yesterday I left the house with a list of about seventeen things that needed to be done, several stop to make, multiple items to pick up at said places and many many things written on my little yellow notepad. It was clean and neat and numbered and I had total and complete faith I’d be successful. At my first stop I hopped out of the car with notepad in hand and the great snowfall of April 16th bit me in the ass. My little notepad flipped out of my hand and landed in a puddle from melting snow…butter side down. 
      • My sister Catherine (Sister Catherine! You were thinkin’ it) told me her solution to this and it’s so genius I don’t know why I never thought of it. Probably because I’m always going 100mph and never stopped to do it. After she makes out her list, she takes a picture of it. then she always has it with her even if she forgets the list at home!!  It’s really quite clever. At the end of the day she deletes it. On to the next list.
      • Now…I know you are all thinking the same thing. Welcome to 2016. Have you never heard of a computer? A smart phone? All those planning notepads you can just put your list directly on your smartphone? Yes. Yes I have. Unfortunately after 30 years of marriage my husband has figured out he can’t change me. I love pen to paper. I just love it. So that’s how it works. I wondered the other day if I could run with a pen in my pocket because I think the clearest when I’m running and I’d just jot it onto my arm, right? That thought…that item I can’t forget…that person to call. Come on…it’s smart! Whatever. I might do it. One of those little half pens (I don’t even like those) but that would be so convenient.
      • It’s Earth Day! Celebrate accordingly! I am celebrating by driving to MT with MT> I’m not sure how that correlates but in my head it works. It’s a little scary in my head.
      • Prince died yesterday and I am sad beyond words. Also sad that some news outlets are prematurely reporting it may be opiate related. I choose to believe only the best about Prince because he always seemed to hold himself to a higher standard and until I hear different that’s what I’m sticking with. It would be great if just once we would not find out a person in the entertainment industry succumbed to drugs and that lifestyle.
      • My whole family just told me…again…that I’m an angry typist. I’m going to change my blog name to The Angry Typist… 🙂 I pound these keys with FURY! It’s actually excitement and energy but it’s the same thing!! 

~~~~~
3.5 miles yesterday evening in the most beautiful weather with the clear evening sky and running a route I haven’t done in a long time. It was so good to be back out on it again. I stopped a few times (once to have a small dance party…good song) and the rest to just …rest. Then when I got home I just danced it out because that’s my favorite. What a great evening for a run. Perfect.

Run on…and have a great time…

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Organization continued…and that stinkin’ pebble in your shoe.

  • To expand on listing your life and how to be organized from yesterday, I’d like to add when you’re making your list it’s important to keep in mind where your errands are so you can run them in the most efficient manner. Sometimes I have to write the list twice for this. Write it all down…then number them. Sometimes I rewrite and sometimes I give myself enough credit to be able to find the next number no matter where it is on the page. IT’s a game!…LOL. Either way, if I start on the South East side of town and get all those errands done and work my way to the West side and up North and back home again to our house on the East side. (sing that song…name that tune) it’s just the most efficient. Like grocery shopping. And you are less likely to forget those errands.
    *Link here~ it won’t let me show you the actual one but points if you know it!
  • You know when you cut open an avocado in all it’s perfection and after it’s scooped out…the side by the skin is all black and gross?…I want my avocado dreams back. #avocadodreams #mynewbandname #Idontplay
  • I tried on the wedding outfit and I know you’re all shocked to hear that it was really and truly awful. Yep. That’s right. Awful. I stood there at midnight thinking…well bad word…I’ll just have to wear something else. So I grabbed my favorite pencil skirt (yes it’s black, do you really wonder that?), a cream colored blouse, a little black jacket and some heels and my husband said it was great. Very me so I’m done. Ugh. I just want to be home in the corner watching Netflix. Can’t I be home in the corner watching Netflix? It’s been suggested that I’m perhaps I have a problem. I think that’s harsh. I just really really really don’t want to go anywhere. Yeah, that’s it. #netflixforever #firststepisadmitting #youcantmakeme

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I realize the importance of this but I grabbed it because on my five miles yesterday my sock got a hole in the toe and it was awful. I finally had to stop and swap socks to the other side. It was ridiculous.  The pebble in your shoe..right? Wear good socks, People.  And also…what he said.

Five miles yesterday which went incredibly slow and slogging because I realized I’m not eating well. Today I have to eat. And this evening I’m going to get my four miles done…why? Because I have to take care of me.  That’s the lesson this week!!!

source

Run on…in good socks. The hole in your toe is so annoying. SO ANNOYING. 

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How I get it all done.

  • My life is all about lists. I start my day with lists. I almost always have multiple lists going. Currently I have a baby shower list, a daily list, and a going to MT this weekend list. And if we’re doing it right…those lists have sublists. You can’t just say “vacuum” on the list.  I’ll never cross that off and I’ll just get overwhelmed. So I’ll say “vacuum – upstairs, downstairs, stair one, stair two”. Then I can cross them off as I get them done and also not forget to finish those tasks as I go. I totally may forget the spare bedroom…you never know. Okay…I wouldn’t do that. But my OCD brain makes me put them all on the list.
  • Yesterday’s list had twenty one items on it.  I crossed off ::stopping to count:: nine and two subitems. Huh. Now I’m depressed. I totally thought I did better than that. Hm. TEN! Ha. (mostly finished the blog…ten and a half?)
  • At the end of each day I tear off the list, evaluate what’s been done, go to a nice clean sheet and start again. Tomorrow’s list should have ten more items on it not counting sub items but instead I have a list of sixteen items. I’ve added a few…life is constantly changing.
  • Yesterday I went to run an errand and I needed MT to answer a question. So I texted him and after I hit send I put the phone up to my ear…like I was calling him, right? Scary, I know. I’ve forgotten how to use a phone. Scarier? Not the first time I’ve done that. That’s when you know you REALLY have a lot on your mind. #doacrossword

  • As part of the baby shower adventure I googled  “Alice in Wonderland the book” (minus the quotes of course). I just needed to make sure I didn’t get the movie or Disney or anything. I ended up on Biblio and (stick with me, I know, it’s a little boring) they have a copy of one of the first printings of the book. Wouldn’t that be amazing? it’s only $7500. Yep. That’s right. But take care to make sure you can afford the $8 shipping and handling.  I totally backed out. I was ready to buy but when I saw that outrageous fee for the shipping well…there was no way.  A girl has to be able to afford shoes. I mean…seriously.  #downtherabbithole

~~~~~

Five miles this morning because I need a good solid run.  And…it’s the perfect beautiful weather for it. Denver’s twenty inches?? Melting insanely fast. Sidewalks are clear, streets are clear. Only my yard has snow. Just my yard. My yard will be the last yard to have snow. It’s destined to be. There’s a lot to do this week and I need the downtime. This is the time I start to give up on me because “I just don’t have time, I’ll get it in later” but I don’t get it in later. And I don’t feel top of my physical game right now. My doctor did get back to me and she boosted my meds microscopically so I’m not sure if it’ll help or not. I’ve never had them boosted this small amount so I have to wait and see. Meanwhile keep pushing through and remembering to get my time in. 

source

I think this is so true, I spout this a lot to people. I can’t stand “excuse people”. I think if you want it bad enough you have to at least try. I have no patience for people who just excuse their life away and never try.  This applies to every aspect of your life, not just running.  It doesn’t matter how old you are. It doesn’t matter what is holding you back…start with baby steps and creep your way forward and you may find the amazing resources this world has to offer you will provide a path you never expected. 

Run on…run forward…no excuses…open hearts…

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