Jackie…OH. Dammit. Well maybe next time.

Remember my beautiful doctor with gorgeous shoes all the time?

I mean seriously, great shoes.

So I wore my cute shoes to not feel like a schmuck…and…

My shoes had mud on them.  Yeah.

the devil wears prada animated gif on Giphy

I’m so awesome.  I noticed it afterward.  I’m telling you.  Sometimes you just have sparkle, don’t you??

It wasn’t even a bad day. It was just a day when you’re clearly not Jackie O.  Not that I ever am.

But a girl can dream. Right?

Or frankly anywhere near her.  *sigh*

~~~~~

Work on Tuesday was so awful I cried.  The rest of the week has been great and now I’ve entered False Hope Land.  It’s a real place. I plan to stay here as long as possible.  It’s a beautiful place to be.  It has kittens and rainbows.  And cupcakes.

~~~~~

I heard on the radio the other day that cupcakes and coffee are now out.  They are cool no longer.  ??

Random, huh?  On what planet are cupcakes not cool.

The new thing?  Brace yourself.

Toast. 

Yep.  Toast.  Coffee places are now offering Toast.  Huh.  Go figure.

~~~~~

I would give my right arm for a cheeseburger right now.  It’s pretty wrong nobody delivers cheeseburgers.

~~~~~

The doctor referred me to a gastroenterologist because I’m not swallowing properly.  My appt is for early next week.  Three hours after I made the appointment the machine attached to the doctors office called my phone to confirm the appointment.  They used a different doctors name and no “Dr” on the caller ID so I just have to accept someone is calling me and answer it. They’ve now called four  five times.  They finally left a message and in the message they confirmed the appointment and then said they were calling until they actually reach me.

I love this doctors office SO MUCH.

that was sarcasm.

~~~~~

seriously.  a cheeseburger.

~~~~~

I am attempting grocery shopping this weekend.  I don’t have a million things to do so I think I can pull it off.  It’s a matter of grocery listing…

There’s the rub.

Figuring out what I want.  What I need.  If I care.

~~~~~

Oh…so as I wrote this post I crashed. Slept for three hours. Woke up and went to the grocery store and bought everything to make burgers.

I’m not kidding when I say I want something. I want it now.  My brain takes completely over.

We ate burgers at 10:30 at night. Best burgers ever.

~~~~~

::Most boring story you’ve heard today. Possibly ever::

When I was a little kid my dad was watching a movie with my sisters and I think one of their boyfriends.  Totally into it.  He asked what I wanted for dinner. All I wanted was a hot dog. I craved it.I needed it.It was all I could THINK about.  I looked all through the house and nothing else sounded even remotely good.  I told him I wanted a hot dog and he said we didn’t have any.  He’d fix me something else.

Time passed and I told him again.

Then I told him again.

I honestly don’t know how many times I said I wanted it.  Probably three or four.

He finally snapped, stood up, grabbed his keys and stormed out of the house, leaving the movie and the group.

I felt awful. I don’t know what I WAS expecting.  That he’d push a button and a hot dog would show up?

Twenty minutes later he comes back and tosses the hot dogs on the table and snaps at me not to ever do that again. 

Of course, I never would because I’d already punished myself and all these years later still remember how terrible I felt making him leave when he was having such a good time.

I was always a rule follower, I never wanted to get in trouble.  But food issues, yep. Always had them.

Irony…I cannot stand hot dogs. 

~~~~~

Grocery store had Valentine’s Flowers clearanced for $3.

Barely pink roses… clearanced…they are a little rough around the edges but a day of pretty for $3 is really worth it, right?  That’s what I think, too.

IMG_20140221_223404

~~~~~

I just figured out that my favorite Lauren Conrad Jean leggings (jeggings?) have no butt. They used to have a butt but it’s worn so thin you can now see through it.  Oh yikes. That’s just not attractive.  How long have I been wearing THAT??  Pretty sure Jackie O never wore pants you could see through.  Okay, she probably never wore Jeggings either (not really sure they are jeggings but they are seriously pretty, super dark blue and I wear them to work.  So sad).  I asked my husband and he SWORE he would tell me and hadn’t noticed.  I’m throwing them away as NO one should be wearing jeans with no butt.  I’m pretty sure it happened from me sliding into my too tall cloth teller chair at work.  Bummer.
Oh the irony as I actually don’t have much of a butt anyway so it really isn’t revealing much.

Now I have to go shopping for a pair of pants I already owned.  Nothing fun about that.

~~~~~

As I tell him this story I comment that Jackie O probably didn’t have a kitchen that looked like this either (straightening as I go).  It’s morning, I have drugs in various places, computers in various places, things in various places.  He says, “I’m sure she had HELP with the kitchen…like…from birth”.

This is a valid point and helps, remarkably.

~~~~~
I’m going for a run but I had to wait until it was at least 30*.  Yeah…it’s a little chilly.

I got up this morning and wanted to do yoga but there is a couch in front of my television.

So I thought…I’ll get on my treadmill.

There are books piled on my treadmill.

Blasphemy.

So I am running out of doors where it is wicked cold. I’m just bundling with drugs.

I’m taking drugs.

And I’m bundling up warm.

I’ll keep you posted on how it goes and if I don’t come back it means I died in the cold. Froze to death.

cold animated gif on Giphy

~~~~~

Run on and if you’re racing?  Have a great race!  If you’re running just for you…zen on. 

 

 

2 Replies to “Jackie…OH. Dammit. Well maybe next time.”

  1. Bless your frozen tail, nose , ears and toes. Absolutely, Jackie O. had help in the kitchen, child rearing and clothes shopping (detecting worn-ness). You are a one woman super hero!!

  2. Man…I think we all are, especially on days like these, right? You should see my chaotic house right now! How people do it and still look so put together is beyond me.

    If I ever win the lottery, which would be really tough since I don’t play, I would get a chef. Then I could focus on the cleaning and looking like Jackie O. And maybe a personal shopper! *swoon* That would be fabulous.

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