What’s your secret

How much do we LOVE this??

Shalane Flanagan Wins the New York City Marathon

Yeah…best moment. Between her and Meb I just want to go run right this moment.  And they’re such good people they deserve every great thing life brings them.

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On Facebook I’m connected to a writer friend of mine.  He posed a question on his page…”what’s something you’ve done that you’re sure you’re the only one on my friends list that’s done it?”

Well…let me just say that reading the responses I’ve decided I’ve totally wasted my life.  You would not BELIEVE what people have done.

“Been on the cover of time magazine, dec.1969 issue for the takeover of Alcatraz nov 20, 1969. ~As a member og the group of native americans who took the island over around 3am nov. 20th, 1969.” ~ Geneva Seaboy
 I mean…come ON. That’s a beautiful part of history right there, People.

One lady babysat Jeffrey Dahmer when Dahmer was about 8 or 9 and the guy was 16. Apparently, he was nuts then, too. I won’t go into details.

Someone chatted with Jackie O while driving her on a short ride to a friend’s house. Said she was lovely and personable. (Swoon with jealousy)

There was a man that bartended at a university function and served a glass of water to the Dalai Lama.

There were crash landings, island strandings and movie star visits.  

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And of course, one guy who was probably having the same thought I was. He said, “Shot a man in Reno, just to watch him die.”

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yes…yes you are. sigh…I love Johnny Cash.

I do have a few stories (okay, maybe only one or two and they are not that exciting)…but mine I take to my grave. They are definitely not blog worthy. This takes the excitement away, I know. But rest assured…I didn’t shoot a man in Reno and I didn’t babysit any serial kill…oh wait. I did babysit for someone who murdered someone. huh. I forgot that.

Eh that was a long time ago.

And I have been to see the Dalai Lama but I didn’t serve him water, I just heard him speak and it was as amazing as you would imagine. But it was amazing for a few thousand people so…doesn’t qualify probably.  I’ll keep thinking.  Pretty sure my kids could answer this question in a HOT SECOND.

Someone mentioned the post has over 350 comments so far. It is ridiculously interesting but really it’s the concept. Who knew people had these secrets in their past?
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Michelle and I climbed Mt Falcon Castle Trail on Saturday. And it hurt. Not during the climbing but afterwards…yikes. Seriously everything hurt.

The last time we went hiking we went much further and I didn’t hurt at all but today was a milder hike and man, my whole body aches. Probably something I ate affecting me. My guess? Kettle Jalapeno chips. I know you guys think I’m nuts but I don’t feel good after I eat them. I bought them Friday, first time in months. I think I’m over them. Weird right? Don’t get too upset, I’m still all in for jalapenos. Just these chips are a no go.

According to All Trails, the Mt Falcon Castle Trail is 7.9 miles. I’m not sure how they came to that conclusion. We climbed from the East parking lot up to the castle. At the castle we still had plenty of energy and we felt like we wanted more so we headed towards the West parking lot about a quarter of a mile thinking we’d get a great view  and we were not wrong. We did get a great view…. but we also got like 20mph winds. It was insane. Still pretty though.

We flipped around after that and headed back. The entire time we were hiking we were rewarded with deer sightings. They were everywhere just hangin’ out and having breakfast. Very relaxed. We went ridiculously early so there was virtually no one on the trail but us. Nice and quiet.

It was a beautiful way to spend the morning. Michelle and I don’t get much time together so when she messages with a “wanna hike?” I always say ~hell yes~ because it’s one of the joyous things in the world and she agrees. Just to be outside.

It was really bright outside and we were wearing really really bright clothes. The deer were not afraid at any point because we were easily spotted ten miles away.
In the end we hiked 6.5 miles according to all of the technology we were wearing so I again am not sure how they came up with 7.9 but whatever. 6.5 miles was plenty. I hurt like I had run 18 miles in the middle of a snowstorm. That was Saturday and on Sunday I still felt it.
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Monday:

#myworkoutis
3 easy miles|
40 push ups
40 squats
2 minute plank

Let’s hope I find the perfect temperature window to get that workout done in.

~~~~~

It's only cold if you're standing still. Check out my post - Five Cold Weather Running Tips.

Run on…

Let’s talk Botox

On the heels of such a terrible migraine and the Botox follow up I thought I would talk about what Botox is all about. Two years ago in February I got my first injections and I’ve had them every three months since.

They have always worked well for me, however, as time has passed the shots work better and better. I take two different medications for my migraines because Botox doesn’t make them all go away.  I continue to get some occasionally and one of those medications I would routinely fill every six weeks. I filled it six weeks ago and I’ve barely touched it. I have a full bottle.

Here is a photo of my neurologist who has nearly perfect reviews. His name is Dr. Ravi Shah.
Image result for dr ravi shah imagesI know. It’s a terrible quality picture. He doesn’t have a professional photo, how weird is that? I think this was cut out of a office snapshot or something. Anyway…here he is. He’s very GQ. Funny, so is my Celiac specialist. Suppose that has anything to do with the amount of money I’m paying for their services?
He is as good as the reviews say. He’s nice, he listens, he’s friendly, he always tries to fix whatever the problem is, and he goes out of his way to make sure I have meds…even if they’re samples until he can get me hooked up with what works. I have no problem getting an appointment and when I do have a problem he fits me in to fix it (I’m expressive, occasionally the Botox would freeze my eyebrow in “hey Baby, how you doin’? mode).
His specialties are neurology and psychology.
Yeah..I know. I’m screwed. Pretty sure he’s got me figured out.
A little of my history. I’ve been getting migraines as long as I can remember. I remember having headaches when I was very little and my mom was always trying different things to figure out how to help me. I finally figured they were migraines when I was 18 and was in the emergency room. They told me my “headache” was a migraine. Once that diagnosis was made my life got easier…if you could say that. Right?

Things to know about Botox

  • Botox does not help if you get episodic migraines or fewer than 15 migraines a month.
  • If you’re going to try it, settle in to give it two or three tries. Mine worked well the first time but each time it got better and continues to improve.
  • the cost is high. My insurance covers some of the cost so I am left with the cost of the actual vials which right now are about $600+ per vial. My doctor uses two vials on me. I also pay for my doctors visit which is $227 a visit. If my deductible is paid up then hey…this is no problem. If it’s nowhere near paid up then this comes out of either…
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    A: my health fund or:
    B: my own sad little pocket
    As you can imagine, my choice to do this was discussed with my husband at length and we processed  the cost/how well does it do it’s job- factor at length and continue to review it every few visits.
  • Botox (the brand name…) offers a Botox credit card that credits you BACK if you do the work. The work being paperwork. After I got my first treatment they gave me the paperwork. I signed up on the Botox website and filled out the information including uploading the last Botox treatment information. They sent me a credit card loaded with $240 on it that was “refunded”. I can use it on anything medical related. So the next treatment I can use it on the Botox or I can use it on the office visit or I can use it on another doctor’s visit. It just has to be medically related. I think right now I have nearly $500 on it. There is an expiration date of six months I think. They may have changed that with the new update.
  • I see him every twelve weeks and as the time winds down my head reminds me it’s happening. As it wears of, I get more migraines. That twelve week cycle is very tight for me.
  • I am still on Topiramate (generic forTopamax) as preventative medication and I also have Fiorinal and Cambia to actually treat any migraine I do get. He’s tried taking me off Topiramate and my migraines increase significantly enough that he’s leaving me on them for now. He did decrease the dosage (after the eye twitching episode a few months ago) but otherwise everything stays the same. I take 150mg a day. 50mg in the middle of the day and 100mg at night.My excuse for being brain dead is called Topamax. What's yours? BY: Gina Fabrizio
  • The Botox for migraines is diluted before it’s injected. It’s injected in approximately 31 locations across the head and neck.Image result for Botox migraine injection graphicIn the photo on the left, my injections are way at the top near my hairline, not down so far.  Because I’m pretty expressive, he dots two tiny little injections in the far edges of each eyebrow to keep me from flirting with people I don’t want to flirt with.The photo in the middle is pretty accurate though one of those injections is square in my temple, a prime spot for migraine pain.The third photo is also fairly accurate though the two injections at the bottom of the neck are much lower.
  • Does it hurt? yes. It hurts me for sure. Here is my experience- the shots are short…like two seconds. Short bursts. They aren’t deep, they are just under the surface. But they burn and on my right side-oh my gosh. Like it’s startling sometimes and then I’ll just burst into tears.  Because my migraines are 100% on the right side of my body, Dr Shah told me I would feel more pain on my right side for probably everything. That side would just be more sensitive. Well he isn’t kidding. I had noticed that before he told me and it couldn’t be clearer than when I’m getting these shots. They weren’t too bad the first time I got them but as time goes on they are more painful. I’m sure Dr. Shah loves to have me show up. I’ve passed out twice and I’ve nearly thrown up twice. I am a good time. For the record, I’m his only patient to do this. Also, he has offered me a scrip for Valium if that would help relax me before the shots but I have to drive after so I just deal with it. He has other patients who take it, I just choose not to. On a scale of one to ten, the left side hurts like a..4 maybe? The right side, depending on the situation, feels like a freakin’ 7 or an 8. Two seconds of a burning 8. Then he massages that spot to make sure the Botox disperses. The whole thing takes maybe ten minutes on a good day, twenty minutes if I have to stop.
    Getting Botox on the same day you have a migraine is not a good idea. It might be best to reschedule as the pain is a lot to deal with.  Totally.
  • Side Effects: The nitty gritty.
     1. Headache I always thought this one was random. How would I know?  #alreadythere
    2 . Facial loss of movement– I don’t think so. The first time I got shots my eyebrows ventured out on their own and that’s when I went back and he fixed them. I didn’t look too weird, just always intrigued…LOL. But right now I’m scrunching up my forehead just fine.
    3. Eyelid drooping – yep. my eyelids do seem to be a little droopier after 2.5 years. I’m also older. Good makeup? Lots of smiling… I can’t imagine getting it in other spots. Mine are so high on my hairline. Who knows what it would do to your face. 🙁
     4. Lung inflammation– nope…but I’ve heard about it and it doesn’t sound fun.
    5. Neck pain– neck pain being the most common complaint. 9% of the Botox test group complained of neck pain. I have never had this. 
    6. Muscle stiffness and weakness– how would I know? #thankyouceliac
    7. Muscle pain and spasms – how would I know? #thankyouceliac
     8. Pain at injection site – I have this for a few days after my shots and only in a few places. Sometimes I have small bruises in some of my injection sites but again, only a few.
     9. High blood pressure migraines are the only thing that raise my blood pressure. I still have low blood pressure.
    source:
  • Who to see about Botox: I was sent to a neurologist in my care circle. I still researched him. This was not something I wanted to take a chance on. I wanted to make sure he was a neurologist with years of experience treating migraines. Not everybody can do this. Just because somebody does Botox doesn’t mean they can work with migraines. It’s a delicate specialty. Your corner Botox cosmetic  aesthetician is not who you go to, even though it would probably be cheaper. And your general medical doctor is also not who you go to. You need a specialist and you want to make sure he has credentials. Do your research. 
  • Botox is totally worth it for me. I will continue with it as long as I have these great results.
    Great sources for Botox
    Botox
    Migraineagain.com
    Migraine.com

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My life, SLE, Sjogrens, endometriosis, fibromialgia, chronic migraines
Run on…

the real world.

I called my sister to check in and she had spent the day in the car running errands which we’ve all done and it’s no fun at all. Traffic and frustration, sitting down all day and just generally feeling like you’re getting nothing done but being in the car. It wasn’t a terrible day, she’ll live. It just wasn’t her favorite. I would have been near tears. I can’t stand being in the car all day. It makes me itchy to move. But the worst part was the first thing she said to me was…I’m sorry about your purple fingernails.

She said she was sorry I had purple fingernails.

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It definitely makes you feel thisbig (you have to put your fingers together really tiny to make that visual work…).

I don’t talk to her every day so I thought I would explain that I may have purple fingernails but that’s not my life. I mean…I have real life issues that I just don’t post about because people happy posts. They like happy stuff. I know. You’re thinking…are you kidding? You write about happy stuff?
Hey now. Watch that attitude.

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Here’s a quick look at the top things on my mind #rightthissecond because that’s how my head works. It’s never one thing. Remember, there’s an equal number of happy thing on my mind so it’s not just these things. These are just real life.
Yes, my son got married (pretty happy and exciting!) but this payday my budget is so freaking tight because I basically bought a car for that rehearsal dinner.
I love my 2005 Jeep Liberty so much I intend to drive it until it dies right there on the street. I needed an inspection for this year’s registration so I did a search to aid the passing of said inspection because I’m apparently leaking fluids that I can’t identify since I don’t see leaks and I assume I’m burning oil (going through oil and my last mechanic told me I had many leaks). That CAN’T pass, right? I put just the right amount of gas in (not too much, not too little, Goldilocks) and I drove on the interstate to get it nice and warmed up and I got the oil changed the day before and I swear to God above I prayed the whole time it was getting inspected because I can’t replace a car right now and I can’t pay to get it fixed. It passed.

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I started a new business nearly a year ago that is succeeding beautifully at failing. Because I am an overachiever and hey…we all have to be good at something. But damn it looks good while it’s doing it. But I love it so much I’m determined. I actually had a friend ask me the other day, “and what is that…other thing…you have…that…business thing…you have?? I don’t really know what it is…” And thus you have the crux of THAT problem. My business has a giant identity problem.

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I have a great new job that is part time and it is giving me some pretty awesome validation because they love and appreciate me there.  Moving on… my husband said (totally paraphrasing) ~it’s too bad. Any money you actually make will be gone to taxes so you may as well not. I mean, I know you like it so…I guess you can for that…you know…because you like it…”. Pretty sure there was a virtual pat on the head there but I can’t guarantee it. In case you’re wondering, yep. He’s still my favorite. Shocking, I know. He’s really nice and he’s cute and I get to brag about “my husband is sooo smart… ” I’m shallow like that.
I figured out a few weeks ago that my OCD is strong enough it overrides my need to run. I have to get things done or I can’t concentrate on even getting out the door. So my run goes to the wayside. Do I prefer that? Nope. I’d way rather run but it is what it is. So when I have a lot of balls in the air, I don’t find the time to get it done. On the rare occasion I’m able to push through it’s pretty amazing and I celebrate those times.
I’m helping plan a wedding with my  sister Catherine (who I love and adore over most anyone in the world) and her daughter “B”. I’m pretty sure I’m making my sister crazy totally by accident.   I was talking to her just today and said something about both B and I talking to the same person and that person doesn’t have time to answer both of us and Catherine said that person should have replied to both of us. Then the lightbulb. I should have courtesy copied B on the correspondence and from now on I will. I don’t think about that because B doesn’t love email but it’s really just courtesy (it’s built right into the name!) and I don’t know why that didn’t occur to me before now because that’s something I would do. Anyway, thinking smarter.  It’s innovation. Sister Catherine sounded irritated. Whatever, we’re moving on.

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I have a pile of things I have to sell since the wedding. Formal gown, pretty awesome floral bouquets, table numbers…things like that.  Selling things is hit and miss. Sometimes you’re hot. Sometimes…things just don’t go. I suspect it’s going to be that way.  And until they sell they take over my living room as a constant reminder of what I have to get done and also because I have nowhere else to put them.
I can…without any thought whatsoever...throw out ten massive things that have to be repaired/replaced/renovated (I just needed another “r” word) and any one of them could go at any time. I predict Christmas.

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I JUST remembered I have to buy a plane ticket…I shoulda married a pilot. Or a mechanic. Yeah. A mechanic. ~as I say this I remember my amazing, kind, wonderful, thoughtful husband left his work today to come to mine (he makes like more than four times what I do so that’s money well spent) to do a quick computer thing and spent four hours there fixing the problem. Four hours. It was crazy. My IT guy is pretty awesome.
And if we’re rounding it to an easy 10 things…I hated my hair so much at the wedding. So much. And I’m pretty sure every picture of me will look really really bad. Like..I’m going to hate them. And everyone will say, “you hate all pictures of yourself.” No I don’t. I really like the one up here on the right. And the one in my about page. And I have some family pictures I like. And photos with Sean. I like some photos. But I won’t go into details because I just know I won’t like it. And I’m pretty sure I’ll get a big ol’ family photo for Christmas I’ll have to display and act like I love and if I never see it again I don’t care. Plus my husband’s step mom brought her camera to the wedding and people always think you’ll love all photos of your family without thinking if everyone likes the pictures. And sometimes they just don’t! Photos should be screened by the family before being reproduced and passed around to everyone which I think is really really rude or being posted and tagged in front of everyone. That’s happened to me before.  Be thoughtful. My generous tip of the day.  And no, I’m not just being paranoid, I’m saying this about everyone who had their picture taken that day because I know every person in my family and I know how they all feel about photos and it’s courtesy to think beyond yourself.
No Mom, I don’t need therapy.

So yeah…sometimes I just want to think about … geez don’t you hate it when you get your nails done and they’re PURPLE?  

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It just gives me something to laugh about, that’s all. Purple fingernails. 😎

~~~~~
#myworkoutwas
I got my steps in (I know, you’re kind of unimpressed but again, I was at work for so long and we had no food we were starving so…that’s where it went. My time I mean).
60 squats
60 push ups

Top Ten Quotes Of The Day

I’m working on it, okay?
Run on…

Are you an empath? And what is one? Do I want to be one? Do I have a choice…

So I’ve been interested in the word empath.- Being an empath is when you are affected by other people’s energies, and have an innate ability to intuitively feel and perceive others. Your life is unconsciously influenced by others’ desires, wishes, thoughts, and moods. Being an empath is much more than being highly sensitive and it’s not just limited to emotions. -source

I’ve heard it being passed around rather liberally lately and it seems everyone and their neighbor, best friend and cat is an empath (by the way, if your cat is an empath I am highly interested in meeting him or her. Most cats just have one mood and we all know what that is..).

When I hear it I’m taken to Charmed with Piper, Phoebe and Paige, the supernatural empath. I know it’s not the same thing but that’s where my head goes.  I get it. It’s not The Handmaid’s Tale. But we all have a vice and mine was Charmed. Piper got to blow things up. Don’t tell me you wouldn’t want that power.  Think of the anger issues that would be abused with that power.

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don’t you judge me one bit…you guys have your television, I have mine.

There was a search plethora of empath results and I didn’t really know where to begin. Most of them were “30 ways to tell if you’re an empath” or “20 ways to tell…” or lengthy little lists like that.
But I grabbed onto Psychology Today for something and found this:
10 Traits Empathic People Share 

1. Empaths are highly sensative-Empaths are naturally giving, spiritually open, and good listeners.
2. Empaths absorb other people’s emotions– Empaths are highly attuned to other people’s moods, good and bad
3. Many empaths are introverted. -Empaths become overwhelmed in crowds, which can amplify their empathy. They tend to be introverted and prefer one-to-one contact or small groups. Even if an empath is more extroverted they may prefer to limit how much time they spend in a crowd or at a party.
4. Empaths are highly intuitive– Empaths experience the world through their intuition. It is important for them to develop their intuition and listen to their gut feelings about people.
5. Empaths need alone time– As super-responders, empaths find being around people can be draining, so they periodically need time alone to recharge.
6. Empaths can become overwhelmed in intimate relationships– Too much togetherness can be difficult for an empath so they may avoid intimate relationships.
7. Empaths are targets for energy vampires– An empath’s sensitivity makes them particularly easy marks for energy vampires, whose fear or rage can sap their energy and peace of mind.
8. An empath becomes replenished in nature– The busyness of everyday life can be too much for an empath.
9. Empath’s have highly tuned senses- An empath’s nerves can get frayed by noise, smells, or excessive talking.
10. Empaths have huge hearts but sometimes give too much– Empaths are big-hearted people and try to relieve the pain of others: a homeless person holding a cardboard “I’m hungry” sign at a busy intersection, a hurt child, a distraught friend.

So I hit 9 out of 10 solid. Number 6 was a no but the rest…dead on. Some of them so accurate I wanted to shout out “yes!”.
So I switched to The Mind Unleashed and went through that list of 30…I know. It’s not Psychology Today but bear with me. It was crazy.

I’m 25 out of 30.

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So…that was interesting. I mean it was a hard 25. No wavering there. I’m going to assume that I’m at the very least highly sensitive and this explains why I can’t read an article to my husband without crying, why I have no interest in watching the truly violent shows (and if I do, I close my eyes at the worst parts…or I leave the room).
I felt a little less crazy, reading that list.

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I start a new job this week. It’s part time but I’m my church’s new office admin and I’ll be re-organizing it. I am now officially REALLY busy.
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I like using my brain though so it’ll be good.
I’ve been working with them for about two months so it’s not really new,  just show up at the church and actually be a presence now. There are definitely new duties attached to that.
I do like organizing. Did I mention that? Finding order where there wasn’t.

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I’ve felt slightly under the weather all week long. One thing after another just not cooperating. We had crazy weather the other day with 26mph wind gusts. The result was an overall aching and a migraine today. But I drugged up and went straight to sleep.
When I woke up…it was gone.
SHUT UP..I KNOW. I couldn’t believe it either. That NEVER happens.
It was a good day.
I realize it’s odd to hear me say migraine day was a good day but…it was a good day.
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I have a doctor appointment today…a regular Celiac/thyroid checkup. We’ll see if I’m broken or whatever. Grocery shopping. Computer work. It’s going to be a gorgeous week of 70’s so …fall weather, golden leaves and 70*…
this week could not be more perfect.


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yes please. 

Run on…

It’s Friday the 13th and that never gets old.

Some guy called me this morning and asked if he could come over and shower in my house.
I didn’t recognize the number but he sounded nice so I figured…why not?
Turns out I do know the guy.
MT’s friend is in the Army Reserves and he had a PT test this morning before work and his timing was off so he finished on the base and then had to go straight to work. We live very close to the base. So he asked if he could use the shower and then off he went to work.
Military people shower very quickly.
And they are very clean. He folded his wet towel.
Don’t worry, it wasn’t weird. He’s a super nice kid. Once I figured out who he was.  It’s not everyday some stranger calls you and asks that question.
I immediately put his number in my phone. In my defense, I always talk to him on Facebook.
It’s proving to be a fun day already!
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I woke up this morning and thought…yeah I should TOTALLY do something cool with my husband today. 

Then I remembered I have theboy coming over!
That’s pretty cool, too.
Last night I went to bed with a serious headache (because I jinxed myself with yesterday’s arrogant little post) and my ankles were quite swollen (what the hell was THAT about? Oh yeah…probably a week of eating cupcakes)  and everything hurt.
Today I woke up with a serious headache, my ankles are normal size (yay!) and I woke up multiple times in the night to crazy leg cramps which we all know is magnesium. But hello..I take magnesium supplements so come on Celiac…allow something to stick please because that hurts BAD.

Well that’s quite a picture, isn’t it?

~~~

As I said,  I spoke too soon. I had a crazy migraine-in-the-making all day yesterday. Nothing serious…it’s just thinking about it. I’m taking good care to not let it get out of hand because I just don’t have time for that.
Pfft….no.
I just don’t WANT it.

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Unfortunately don’t they show up whether you want them to or not? I mean, how do you say no?

~~~~~

Whenever I spend time with my family they always have a million questions about Celiac. And I should have all the answers but sometimes I don’t if you can believe it. Don’t tell my kids.   But I do have Google. And if I don’t have Google I have my sister, Catherine who goes by the nickname…Gacopedia because she is a wealth of useless information.

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This last weekend someone asked if the super high restaurant grill would burn off the gluten thus rendering the grill capable and safe of cooking for me.
I’ll be honest, I immediately thought…nope. And if I had to put money on it (I usually say I’d bet my husband’s paycheck and he usually says to stop betting his paychecks…hahaha)…
I think I hesitated when I answered and said I didn’t think so. I’d have to research it.But I figured …no. I mean…that’s pretty sketch.
Well they were more convinced than I was but I wasn’t willing to risk it. It’s my gut.
Gacopedia came right home and researched that sucker and came up with this article:
Gluten Deteriorates in High Temps????

I skimmed it quick and then asked her…um…if I read it right it says
it sounds like it would but only if left to burn it clean at that high temperature for a ridiculous length of time? Did I skim that super quick accurately enough?
Which basically says to me…NOPE.
But apparently I did not. Full disclosure I seriously SERIOUSLY skimmed it. I really read like two and a half sentences because my mind was not on reading science. I was doing two things at once and I did not want to stop what I was doing to do something else.  I am selfish. I mean I should have but I just didn’t want to right then. So I did the skim. No patience.
She came back and said this:
He basically says that gluten has the strength of ten men and in order to kill it you need to incinerate it to a molecular level. At which point it becomes carcinogenic. So if you are celiac you must simply run screaming away from it.

Well okay then…I’m totally on board with that. Avoid.

One can always count on Catherine to condense things appropriately. Points on finding that article!

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~~~~~

I was going through the grocery store line and clearly buying a significant amount of gluten-free items. I don’t usually pick up this much stuff but I noticed they had new mixes from my favorite place so I grabbed some scone mixes, cake mixes and such. As the check out lady was scanning them through she said, “can I ask you something? How did you know you needed to go gluten free?”
So I told her I had a blood test and an endoscopy that told me I was Celiac. She said her husband gets a rash and the doctors told them he needed a test but he needed to eat copious amounts of gluten. She sounded intimidated.

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She said they never pursued it. It was a few years ago but he still has the rash.
I reassured her it’s simple…just eat normally and it’ll come up on the test. Eat a pizza. Have a sandwich. Don’t stress.
It’s a blood test and it’s not that expensive.
We talked for a few minutes and I sent her to Gluten Dude and his infographic of symptoms. She thanked me as I left and I thought…I need a business card. Every day I answer questions about Celiac. Every day.
I hope she remembers what I told her. She was really nice.

 

~~~~~

I’m feeling pretty normal beyond a little head pain so I’m hoping to have a regular day. Walk the dog, errands, hang with theboy RUN (my head better cooperate)

Yesterday I got a TON of errands done…don’t you love those days? #feelinproductive

#myworkoutwas
I got my steps in
twenty push ups

I know, it wasn’t much but damn it was a rough day.

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I have high hopes for today. Don’t mess with Friday the 13th.

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Run on…

Celiac and OCD. They aren’t as boring as they sound.

After all my high hopes to go running I got hit with a huge crash yesterday and all I wanted to do was sleep. I let it happen. I was super tired. I did get the house clean and the laundry done and several hours of work with the church which was a big step so I figure I made progress, right? Hm. I tell myself that anyway.
~~~~~
A few reminders…
I am not a doctor. Please call a doctor for any medical needs and issues. This is based on my own medical history.

1 in 133 people has it or 1% of the population.

If you have Hypothyroidism you are five to eight times more likely to have Celiac disease.

It takes the average person 6 to 10 years to get a correct diagnosis.

My friend has been sick for years. Like miserable sick. Joints aching, feeling terrible everything hurts she can barely function some days sick. She  finally (finally!) got a diagnosis of Fibromyalgia but only because the 19 or so doctors (I’m not kidding) didn’t really know where to go with searching. She still hurts, by the way, but hey…she has a diagnosis, right? Her son and my son were in soccer when they were very very small and now my son is off in the Marines and hers is going to school and I chat with her occasionally to say hey.
I do my best to not automatically make everyone I talk to have Celiac disease but listening to her I couldn’t help but wonder. It’s far more common than anyone thinks. And I don’t assume anyone has it. But if you have even a few symptoms I think it’s worth the blood test because it’s a very inexpensive test and one can be Celiac and have no symptoms. It’s worth just to be sure. Everything she was saying was so familiar in one way or another and she just had so many issues.  I finally asked if she was Hypothyroid and she said yes…since just after her son was born. This is very common. Pregnancy often brings on thyroid issues. Well, that clinched it. With the thyroid and Celiac being so closely linked it was only logical she have the test to eliminate the option. I was frankly shocked no one had done it already. I had to be intrusive and push it on her.
I sent her the link to Glutendude’s symptom chart and asked her to count up how many of them she had.
She came back a few minutes later and said, “47”.
Yeah…I think you need a Celiac test. As luck would have it, she had a doctor appointment coming up so she sent her doctor a message and asked for a test.
Tonight she sent me the results.
She’s positive.
I seriously almost cried for her.
Celiac is very commonly misdiagnosed as Fibromyalgia because doctors do not know what it is. 
How many doctors she saw. How many times she was blown off, ignored, misdiagnosed and sent somewhere else because they had no clue. I can’t believe she finally has an answer. I’m ridiculously happy for her to know she can maybe feel better.
This isn’t to say her life is now going to be 100% perfect but this woman has been in misery. Her pain has been unbelievable. Hopefully she’ll finally get some relief.

This is 2017. As I said above, I couldn’t believe no one had already run the test on her.
Gluten free jokes are rampant on late night, in books, in songs and on television everywhere. I can get “gluten free” in restaurants (purportedly) and I can go to gluten free bakeries and restaurants that are exclusively gluten free and Celiac safe. Gluten free is NOT a secret thing. But 19 doctors and not one of them thought to run this test?  With her being Hypothyroid even?  It’s really a sad commentary on what we’re dealing with in the Celiac community. We always think it’s getting better and then something happens like this.

My own doctor even (who is no longer my doctor because he left but randomly I did like him) did not believe I had Celiac disease despite a positive blood test and a positive endoscopy. What.the.hell. He thought it was “trendy”.
I’m…sorry?

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yeah. That’s what I said.
Don’t make it so hard. The answer is there. Just because the rest of the world is being stupid doesn’t mean we have to be.  Fortunately my other doctors (yes, plural) respected the science and were grateful for an answer or I’d still be lost.
Fun fact: It was my suggestion to test me for Celiac.
We have to be our own advocates, especially in this age of skepticism and the internet when the doctors think we’re all just house wives sitting on our asses sitting at home googling Malaria.

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Somehow an eyeroll seems so inadequate. It can be infuriating to be treated this way. I just remember that I’m right. I prepare by being very confident, going in with documentation and intelligent questions and making sure I am as informed as I can be.
I could care about whether or not my doctor believed me but I didn’t because I knew and that was all that mattered.

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~~~~~
The following is a video by John Green talking about his issues with Obsessive Compulsive Disorder and his new book, Turtles All the Way Down. I could really relate to his obsessive thought process. I struggle with the same thing and I have a difficult time controlling it for sure. Mine doesn’t work the exact same way his does, though as he is quick to say everyone’s does work different.  I don’t imagine poisoned food or anything. I just get a terrible thought in my head or a thought I can’t get out of my head (it’s never a good thought) and it’s there replaying like a bad movie over and over and over. Spiders? check. Those suckers are there. They’ll multiply. I’ll have one spider on the counter and pretty soon it’s the biggest spider or six spiders until the movie in my head makes them 100,000 spiders spreading everywhere. The movie I can’t stop.
If I do something embarrassing I’ll replay it over and over and over and over and I can’t stop the replay no matter how much I want to. I’ll be having a normal conversation with you but in the back of my head…replay.
I do have tricks to get past it but they aren’t gone, they’re filed. If the filing cabinet gets opened they’ll be pulled out at a later date. It’s super fun. So I’ll be reading this book because I think the subject is incredibly interesting and also because I love John Green.

If you need mental health services in the U.S., you can find help through SAMHSA     : https://findtreatment.samhsa.gov/ or call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org/
~~~~~
When someone unfriends you on FB but six months later they come out of hiding on Instagram (one post kind of people) to like one of your son’s wedding pictures.  I see you. And I don’t know what to do with you.

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I couldn’t have one without the other..so great.  Also, she unfriended me because I don’t like Trump.

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It’s possible it’s really late and I need more sleep because I’m out of control with the gifs. Moving on now.

~~~~~
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Run on…

the quick and dirty.

Quick and dirty update on me  and then we’re moving on.
This has been the best round of Botox yet. They said it would continue to improve as time went on and they weren’t kidding. I had one seriously bad migraine and that was it. Otherwise I’ve mostly managed with Excedrin and barely needed it. My skin is a little tender today. That tells me I’m thinking about getting a migraine but I’m managing it so there you go.

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I have not been eating well all weekend and it shows in the fact that I’ve been sick.  I lost my dinner on Friday and every day since. Today I am determined to make it through the day. Eating clean is really important to maintaining my carefully balanced stomach.  My morning today was hot water and lemon (thank you Lord for good things like this!) I’m usually incredibly careful but it was wedding weekend and we were traveling and chaos ensued. And let’s face it, we can have a routine all we want but sometimes we go off the rails. It happens.

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When you talk to someone about something that is on your mind and they come completely unglued about your obsessive behavior and proceed to tell you how nuts you are. Because hey…I didn’t already know that based on the constant movie reel in my head.

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She’s probably wishing she had right about now. ::eyeroll::

I have finally finished putting away the weekend wedding stuff.  Okay, mostly. How nuts is that? There was so.much.stuff. Rehearsal dinner stuff. Food and pans and snacks. Clothes for the weekend and clothes for the wedding. Jewelry and shoes, make up and flowers. So many flowers. I’ve never been happier for the trash guy to get here. If I see another formal gown I might scream. I might just take them to the consignment store.  I need my house back. So much stuff.

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In a classic case of ~can you believe today’s news~ I don’t know if I should be more horrified by the wildfires in California or the years of disgusting abuse by Harvey Weinstein. And Donna Karan…hello??  What the hell? She had to apologize of course. There was no coming back from that.

Here’s a link to helping out for the fires. The losses are so devastating.

Eminem at the HipHop awards. He does not mess around.

Anyone heard anything on Puerto Rico????

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I didn’t do anything yesterday for exercise. Nothing. Nada. Zilch.  Zero. And I felt it. So today I’m going to run because I think I need some quiet time to zen out.
Winter is so close (we’ve already had snow!) so I am going to try and enjoy some fall leaf running while I can.

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Run on…

I figure whatever I’m missing will show up right after…

I was reading an article in Outside about the most recent rock slide on El Capitan this last September 27th, just a few days ago.  El Capitan is well known for being a rock climbers dream and there were approximately 30 climbers on it at the time the apartment size sheet of rock came careening down.

The article linked to another page that was more of a chat page where climbers logged in with their personal user names and they clearly knew each other. They posted photos and what they knew of the rock slide so far. People were upset and worried about friends and fellow climbers. There was one woman posting (judging by her user name) and the rest were men or you were guessing gender but everyone was equally distraught at the obvious disaster that had happened and their concern for friends. One climber died in the accident, with 30 climbers up there it would have been much worse.

where am I going with this? At the end of the stream of conversations where 16 people are equally distraught and exclaiming profanities at the loss of life and the possible loss of friends, one guy comes on at the end and says to the known female, “take it easy… (and then names her specifically)..” and then proceeds to explain to her what the situation is and why this happened.

I wanted to reach through the computer. Why not take it easy to the fifteen others who were just as upset?
I can’t tell you how many times someone has said I was “hysterical” or “freaking out”. Um…no.
She was legitimately upset just like everyone else was. It’s not like she was running through a room screaming uncontrollably.
I have so little patience for people treating women that way. I get talked to like that a lot because I have more energy than the average person and it tends to be misunderstood. Energy does not equate to hysteria. It just means I can last longer than you can. Drink more coffee and see me later but don’t bring your condescending attitude.

It’s possible this has bothered me for awhile.

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~~~~~

This has to be the best and the worst story of the day.
Alma couple rescues dog missing for five weeks off Mount Boss

Their 14 year old lab/pit bull mix, Chloe, went missing while they were hiking Mount Boss. Five weeks go by and they are sure she is gone for good. A new couple is in town and they’ve gone hiking and by chance at the end of the day they hear some barking. They stick around, determined to find out where it’s from and they find Chloe…barely 1/3 of her original weight but still alive.
I’m so happy for little Chloe and her parents but the poor girl. What a miserable 5 weeks she lived through. I hope she’s sufficiently pampered every single remaining day of her life. And I hope it’s on satin pillows.

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I get it, this is a cat. I couldn’t find a dog. We take what we can get.
~~~~
I’m feeling ridiculously ahead of the game, very organized and prepared for the wedding weekend in 9 days (8 days now I think).
Something must be wrong.
Let’s not panic. I’m sure it’ll come to me eventually.
Meanwhile, I have everything carefully timed out in a timeline for the days we need it. The addresses we need, the costs associated with each task and who needs to be where.
I honestly don’t know what I’m missing.
Sheesh. It’s probably something huge like…clothing or a person.
Let’s not think about it.

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~~~~~

I was really careful about eating yesterday but something definitely didn’t like me and my stomach was super grumbly. Probably just life. So I hung around the house until it was too late to run outside and figured I’d do the treadmill. Then it was like….ten o’clock and I was pretty determined to do that and then I was yawning and wishing I could sleep. I was also having multiple conversations with people.
I bailed.

#myworkoutwas
10,000+ steps
20 squats which isn’t many but I was killing time while I was cooking chicken. I KNOW> don’t yell at me, Geez.

It’s a cop out workout but whatever I did it.
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Today I am on my way to get my hair done (Princess Anna!). Since I didn’t run yesterday I am DEFINITELY going to today because I miss it already.

Now I’ve jinxed it.

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Run on…

It might have been. Maybe.

I’m not sure there is anything as perfect as running in the rain in the quietest part of the day.

What day is this? Thursday? I lose track of what day you guys are reading. So Tuesday night apparently I did not sleep well. I was restless. I didn’t really realize this but Sean told me I was restless and when I woke up I didn’t feel like I slept much. My usual routine is to go straight downstairs and take meds, drink my lemon water, start my emails, etc.

On this particular morning I headed to the linen closet and started cleaning it. About halfway through I moved to the spare room. Sean finally mentioned that I didn’t sleep well and he wondered, joking, if I dreamed about needing to clean the linen closet but actually what probably happened was my crazy ass feeling of total chaos right now with rehearsal dinner things that need to be finished off, church website updates I need to follow up on, my nieces wedding on my mind, so many upcoming birthdays, Christmas is around the corner, my husband so needs a vacation, my poor dog is allergic to something, and apparently I’m feeling out of control because whenever I start to feel like this I need to clean and organize.

That’s just what I do.

I’ve had a pretty significant list of errands to get done for the last two days and on day one I pretty much blew it off getting only the mandatory two or three things done and then coming home. Yesterday, though, I thought…I need to clean so man I cleaned. The linen closet, the spare bedroom, my master closet, the main livingroom, the cupboard in the kitchen that’s been bothering me, and the garage. I did it all. Then I took a load to Goodwill. When I was done I ran all my errands.

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Sean came home to one of his favorite dinners and freaked out. He thought he was in the Twilight Zone.

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But no. It was real life. Me feeding him dinner at a reasonable hour and having it ready when he actually got home.
For the record that’s not really my fault. He comes in the door at all hours so I usually don’t start supper until he gets  home. It’s very usual for him to come home at 7pm.
I topped it off with the most perfect run and I think it might have been a perfect day. I think it might have been.
~~~~~
Remember last week I wrote 730 South was closing? Sean and I really struggle to find restaurants that are safe for me to eat at and this was such a wonderful place we feel the loss pretty significantly.
Yesterday I read online that Beau Jo’s, a local  pizza place, has closed. They offer gluten free and their servers are always well informed. We always feel welcome there and it’s always a great experience.
I actually started to cry. It’s getting harder and harder.
We had this great breakfast place called LePeep. It was family owned and it was our favorite. They closed but they are a franchise so we chose another one and we started going there. The beauty of LePeep is the vice president or the HR person or someone up in an executive position is Celiac so they take it very seriously.
Or so we thought.
Here we are at the new restaurant and I order an omelet and I tell the server I’m Celiac and he doesn’t understand what I’m saying. So I repeat it and he asks what that is. When I explain what it is he’s so happy to know the actual name of the disease and understand, it was great to educate someone but what the hell? I immediately wanted to leave because if they don’t know what it is how the hell are they going to serve me a gluten free meal?
So. yeah.
That’s restaurant #3.
I’m stepping up my cooking game.

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Netflix is dropping Friday Night Lights after October 1st so if you need a fix better get it now…
I’ve watched the series twice (was it three times? I can’t remember) and I could pretty easily watch it again because it’s that good. Do they ever bring things back? I miss it already. I do not appreciate it when things are not available at the touch of a button.

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On another note, can I ask what the hell is up with rude drivers? We have a crosswalk that has a light smack in the middle of this crazy busy street and I don’t like to push the light because it’s really REALLY long. I don’t want to hold people up so I don’t push the light. I just wait for traffic to slow and I run across at my leisure. It works well. But once in a while when I do it the cars that are coming up on the crosswalk will speed up just to be asses.

This makes me want to push the light every.damn.time.

But I don’t. Because I’m not going to punish everyone for a few jerks.
Jerks.
Hey…did I tell you guys my kid is getting married in like…10 days?
Did I tell you guys I get to see MT in like 9 days? He’s my favorite. At least that’s what he tells me every time I talk to him.

#myworkoutwas
3.5 miles in the rain which was awesome and I wanna do it again right now but duh it’s late and dark so no.
65 pushups
60 squats without weights because the weights were upstairs. I really have to remember to go get the weights. 


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Run on…

I have music in my soul.

My friend got home from three weeks in Peru and Bolivia today. She got violently ill while she was there so she needs some downtime. Pretty sure I’ll see her next week. A MONTH without seeing her. WITHDRAWAL.

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I was at Michael’s yesterday, as I seem to be nearly every day “where everybody knows your name” (they are thisclose to knowing my name) and I started dancing in the aisle because, well, why not. It was a good song. I looked up and there was some guy chuckling at me.

I’ve learned not to care when people are watching me because I truly TRULY love to dance, so I laughed with him and I told him it was a good song. He said he wished he could dance. When I started to ask why he couldn’t he interrupted me to tell me he can’t dance and he said, “dancing is for people who have music in their soul. You have to have it in your soul. I just don’t have it”.

I’m not going to lie, that was definitely not a happy moment right there. He didn’t want to talk about that. He just nodded and moved on. It makes me sad when someone doesn’t even want to consider the possibility of dancing because I think it really is possible. We don’t have to be superstars. We just have to close our eyes and feel it. For someone who hears music all the time, it’s so hard to me to imagine that’s impossible.

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~~~~~

Yesterday was personal errand day. Wax my eyebrows (so painful!) and nails day. I make sure to keep my nails done because Celiac makes sure to keep my nails shredded and bleeding. It’s a really good time They’re in great condition right now (knock on wood) so if I keep taking good care of them they’ll stay that way. If I wait too long before I go in then my polish peels off and within a few hours they shred right off and I have no nails. It’s the craziest thing.

It’s countdown to the wedding time (eleven days!). Eyebrows, nails, you know…gotta make sure things are tidy and pretty. Hair next!

And of course, running for my sanity. No joke there.

We’re all stalking the weather report. It’s fall here and fall in Colorado is nothing to mess with.
~~~~~
I spent last night working on place cards. I have now purchased two different downloads from Etsy (fortunately they are not expensive).  The first kind was too flowery (Goldilocks much?) but the second one was okay and I was in a hurry. For a small amount of money (about $6) you can download a file and two minutes later you can print.
Except the ones I liked wouldn’t print. They kept kicking off the last little bit of the tails of the names. Like this:

It shows fine on the screen then prints like that.  What the hell? It was getting torturous.
I worked on it for a good hour. Then I had Sean work on it. Then I slept on the couch because I was weary of the fight with the whole thing.
I messaged the owner and he said it was a printer problem. He said he’d be happy to help me with it by doing x and y. Of course we could do x and y so we did and guess what? That did not fix it.
This took several days and I was tired of the whole damn thing. The restaurant is dark and I no longer cared. Who’s going to look? So I just printed them. Three cards in I started looking on Etsy for another font. It was driving me nuts. 30 minutes later I thought…I’ve lost my mind. Seriously, it’s a font. You HAVE to give this up. So I printed the rest and went to bed and I kid you not it continues to bug me but sometimes we have to give things up.
This one is not my favorite.
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#myworkoutwas  12,000 steps and 65 pushups

I know, it was a weird workout. But I was crazy busy yesterday so I just didn’t have much of a workout but I was in constant motion. I did get a two + mile walk in top speed and my pushups which are always good. But I didn’t get my squats (sad day!) or my planks (sadder!)

Today will be better but yesterday wasn’t terrible! Just…odd. It was like having french fries and ice cream for lunch.

Which actually sounds delicious.
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~~~~~
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Run on…